Reason #5329 not to buy a knock off dress on e-bay.

It smells like cat piss.

It doesn't smell like cat piss initially.  When you first see it, it is a vision in shiny satin fabric that has the same basic style lines as the dress you tried on at the store.  As your vision clears, the shiny fabric takes on a too shiny, polyester* glow.

And then you notice the cheap beading.  And the side seams which don't quite meet up.  

When does the magic truely meld?  When you first take out and iron to press out a seam you have just sewn.  Nasty.

The extra crappy part--polyester doesn't respond well to steaming.  So I was lucky enough to spend 45 golden minutes reveling in the sweet smell of urine, as if your dear cat had pissed all over the golden pillow it sits atop and then left it in the sun all day.

*Why does polyester seem to glow, you ask?  It's all about how the filament (thread) is created.  Poly(many) ester (basic organic chemical compound) is made by mixing petroleum by products, coal byproducts, air and water and then taking the vat of chemical-ly goodness and shooting it out into one smooth fiber.  The smoothenss of the surface of the filament (which is very non-porous, which is one of the reasons it doesn't breath.  You know, that whole "oil and water don't mix" thing) gives it a glow that is not replicated in natural fibers.

I'm not a chemist, so if you want to know more, check with the experts.  This is a great overview:     http://www.madehow.com/Volume-2/Polyester.html.

Formerly Fashionable

Today, I am going to alter a dress that is best described as “formerly fashionable.” The bride got the dress in 1997 from a friends bridal store that was going out of business, and it was probably at the height of fashion. Apparently, gigantic tulle skirts with lace applique did reach the height of fashion at one time.

The interesting challenge with this dress is that I’ve been called twice and told to stop working on it b/c of a wedding postponement. Today is the big day when there is no looking back–I’m chopping 6 inches off the bottom,and there is no looking back. Maybe this is the karma that the bride needs to get this wedding to happen on time and in the budget in which they feel more comfortable.